Got back to work yesterday. For 2 days before dat, I was chained down by the depression. Ha ha…depression la sangat. Dunno what got over me sampaikan aku hanya bertafakur di rumah. It was only for two days and I was like slowly losing my mind out of boredom. But I don’t wanna go out, jalan2 kt mall or park or whatever. It was like I reached the stagnant, motionless phase, unable to neither go forward nor unwind it all. Froze in time.
Maybe I’m trying to cocoon myself. Shieldin’ myself from the pain and the hurting which this world had dealt me with. Macam comel lak kalo aku leh cocoon-kan diri aku. Yes, 2 days of nothingness. 2 days of being at the point of nonexistence. 2 days of reflecting on my life and thinking…. thinking….. thinking…… 2 days of wallowing in self pity and gathering the strength to get back on my feet. 2 days of finding my inner strength and the courage to move on. And lotsa good it does me, aye, sirrr! Coz, I was rewarded with chocs n a weird looking red rose which at 1st glance I tot it was plastic. After a closer look and a attempt to sniff it (ala..cm dlm movie2…cium2 bunga.bajet cute la jap), it turned out to be made of feathers…so soft and sweet… bagus2. m lovin’ it!
While contemplating, somehow, my mind wandered to this piece of poetry, written on the cover album of Tommy Page. Bet most of you xkenal pon sape mamat ni kan. Well, 1 of the advantages ade older sisters is that you know the singer from eons before you were born hehe…. Well, I was like years ago, but I still remember the words… kinda sad yet inspiring, telling me not to give up just yet…
Something turns to nothing
And nothing makes you cry
There was something in that nothing
It’s gone and you wonder why
Life can be lived on one thing
For that one thing it could be something.
So wipe those tears of nothing
For tomorrow, there will be something
Thursday, July 2, 2009
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